It's just been sort of . . . embarrassing . . . the last few years to . . . admit to my age.
Still in my 20's? You kidding me?
Still in my 20's? You kidding me?
Would they never end?!!!! ;-)
I remember my friend, Amy, mentioning her sister's observation that: "You know the picture in your mind when you think of yourself as an adult? That's your thirties! They're the best!" I realized this must be true. And somewhere along the line, I also realized I was ready to not be a juvenile 20-something anymore. Ready to move on! Own it, baby! Own it! Woooooo hoooooo!!! Thirty!
(I haven't outgrown my juvenile shouting.... ;-))
(I haven't outgrown my juvenile shouting.... ;-))
In honor of achieving the birthday to which I've looked forward so long, I thought I'd document the mood of all the birthdays I remember. It's a little bit funny to look back and remember a distinct excitement (or not) for each one, and why. And since 30 isn't actually that adult, listing all my birthdays just doesn't take very long....
I'll start with not the first birthday I can remember, but the first when I actually cared about the age I was turning. Eight!
8—Super excitement. I felt old and cool.
9—A little bummed to not be 10, but a little excited to be that much closer.
10—SUPER excitement! I still remember everyone in my class (they were all one or two years older than myself) actually seeming excited for me. "How's it feel to be double-digits?" Oh boy. Like I was on top of the world. (Interesting: just now I was thinking about talking with everyone about my birthday, and remembered standing near class with everyone talking about, whoa, being at war! I looked it up: the war actually did start that week!)
11—Already looking forward to 12.
12—WOOOOO HOOOOOOO!!!!!
13—I'm a TEENAGER!! YES!!! A teen! I could already see myself being 16 and kissing boys.
14—Eh.
15—Driving permit, baby!! (And, since I was the youngest in my class, I actually did get my permit right after my birthday. Very, very, very cool.)
16—Oh boy. THE. Best. Birthday. EVER. (Even though my super-moral me had sworn off kissing. Hehe. And even though I wasn't the 5'10" blonde I'd always pictured for my 16-year-old self. Hahaha!)
17—It seems impossible, but I'm pretty sure I was even more excited about 17 than I had been about 16. I was graduating from high school this year and going off to college. And maybe something inside knew I'd meet Matt that year.... :)
18—Eh. I liked being a 17-year-old college student better. Plus, I had Mono. (No, not from kissing. ;-))
19—I was excited about that one, but my family might not have believed it. I left a series of messages on their voicemail playing "I Hope They Call Me On A Mission" and other missionary tunes in a minor key with sounds of wailing. Haha! If I were male, I'd have been in the MTC that week, starting a mission. It was my dream.
20—Kristin decorated the London Centre with happy birthday signs! Then she helped me get home when I felt totally sick at the Tower of London. Best of times and worst of times! As far as the number is concerned, I was not all that happy about it. I was studying psychology at the time and was overly amused at being classified as an "adolescent." At 20, I was an adult. That sounded too normal. I wanted to be weird. ;-)
21—WAY excited to turn 21! And I wrote in my journal: "Now I don't have to be too embarrassed that Matt and I are seriously dating." Haha!
22—Now I didn't have to be too embarrassed that I was newly married. (Although, with a little hindsight I realize, whoa! 22 is still SUPER young!)
23—Thought it was very aesthetic.
24—GOLDEN YEAR, baby!!! I had been looking forward to it since I was a child and had first heard of a "golden year." (Your "golden birthday" is when your day of birth and your age are the same number.)
25—Sad to see my golden year end, happy that it had ended so happily with miraculously getting pregnant with Seth. Also happy that 25 sounded more "legit" than the early-20's. My suspicion was confirmed when some ladies at work were hassling me: "Ohhhh.... It's your birthday. What are you, like twenty-three? Twenty-four? Ooooohhh...." I laughed and said, "25." And—no joke!—they all went, "oh, ok! Happy Birthday!" New respect was in their eyes, I could tell. Hahahaha!!
26—Eh. Not aesthetic. Kind of blah.
27—I thought 27 sounded AWESOME. I still do.
28—Eh. I really wished I were turning 30. Or staying 27. But 28 just sounded blah.
29—Even more disappointing than 28! Let me be 30 already!!
And then there was 30, which was the most eagerly-anticipated since...well, since my Golden Birthday. :)
Funnily enough, I was too tired on my 30th birthday to do much of anything. An omen of the decade to come? Hahaha!! Even funnier, I just didn't care that I was too tired. I thought, "woo hoo, 30! Now let me sleep...." And I was totally happy with that.
Time can only tell how I'll feel about 40, but for now I'm still thinking that getting older is good stuff.
I'll start with not the first birthday I can remember, but the first when I actually cared about the age I was turning. Eight!
8—Super excitement. I felt old and cool.
9—A little bummed to not be 10, but a little excited to be that much closer.
10—SUPER excitement! I still remember everyone in my class (they were all one or two years older than myself) actually seeming excited for me. "How's it feel to be double-digits?" Oh boy. Like I was on top of the world. (Interesting: just now I was thinking about talking with everyone about my birthday, and remembered standing near class with everyone talking about, whoa, being at war! I looked it up: the war actually did start that week!)
11—Already looking forward to 12.
12—WOOOOO HOOOOOOO!!!!!
13—I'm a TEENAGER!! YES!!! A teen! I could already see myself being 16 and kissing boys.
14—Eh.
15—Driving permit, baby!! (And, since I was the youngest in my class, I actually did get my permit right after my birthday. Very, very, very cool.)
16—Oh boy. THE. Best. Birthday. EVER. (Even though my super-moral me had sworn off kissing. Hehe. And even though I wasn't the 5'10" blonde I'd always pictured for my 16-year-old self. Hahaha!)
17—It seems impossible, but I'm pretty sure I was even more excited about 17 than I had been about 16. I was graduating from high school this year and going off to college. And maybe something inside knew I'd meet Matt that year.... :)
18—Eh. I liked being a 17-year-old college student better. Plus, I had Mono. (No, not from kissing. ;-))
19—I was excited about that one, but my family might not have believed it. I left a series of messages on their voicemail playing "I Hope They Call Me On A Mission" and other missionary tunes in a minor key with sounds of wailing. Haha! If I were male, I'd have been in the MTC that week, starting a mission. It was my dream.
20—Kristin decorated the London Centre with happy birthday signs! Then she helped me get home when I felt totally sick at the Tower of London. Best of times and worst of times! As far as the number is concerned, I was not all that happy about it. I was studying psychology at the time and was overly amused at being classified as an "adolescent." At 20, I was an adult. That sounded too normal. I wanted to be weird. ;-)
21—WAY excited to turn 21! And I wrote in my journal: "Now I don't have to be too embarrassed that Matt and I are seriously dating." Haha!
22—Now I didn't have to be too embarrassed that I was newly married. (Although, with a little hindsight I realize, whoa! 22 is still SUPER young!)
23—Thought it was very aesthetic.
24—GOLDEN YEAR, baby!!! I had been looking forward to it since I was a child and had first heard of a "golden year." (Your "golden birthday" is when your day of birth and your age are the same number.)
25—Sad to see my golden year end, happy that it had ended so happily with miraculously getting pregnant with Seth. Also happy that 25 sounded more "legit" than the early-20's. My suspicion was confirmed when some ladies at work were hassling me: "Ohhhh.... It's your birthday. What are you, like twenty-three? Twenty-four? Ooooohhh...." I laughed and said, "25." And—no joke!—they all went, "oh, ok! Happy Birthday!" New respect was in their eyes, I could tell. Hahahaha!!
26—Eh. Not aesthetic. Kind of blah.
27—I thought 27 sounded AWESOME. I still do.
28—Eh. I really wished I were turning 30. Or staying 27. But 28 just sounded blah.
29—Even more disappointing than 28! Let me be 30 already!!
And then there was 30, which was the most eagerly-anticipated since...well, since my Golden Birthday. :)
Funnily enough, I was too tired on my 30th birthday to do much of anything. An omen of the decade to come? Hahaha!! Even funnier, I just didn't care that I was too tired. I thought, "woo hoo, 30! Now let me sleep...." And I was totally happy with that.
Time can only tell how I'll feel about 40, but for now I'm still thinking that getting older is good stuff.
2 comments:
Happy belated birthday! I hit 30 last year and also didn't really feel up to hitting the town to celebrate. Unfortunately it's at the peak of tax season when Derek never gets home until at least 10 pm and David was so fussy that I took him into the Dr to see if his ears were infected (they weren't). The good news is that since I was 30 (a bonafide adult) I could take it in stride. I hope before too long you won't feel so exhausted. Living with a newborn is tough!
I'd forgotten that I decorated the London Centre on your birthday...but it's a family tradition that John has gracefully accepted so it's still in full-force at our house...and I've come to the realization that I FINALLY feel like I am at the top of my game! It's only taken me almost 30 years, but I'm there baby!!! Bring on my thirties!!!!
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